Leonard's League 16/17 - Week Two

I'm going to break some rules here - two of them actually, and talk about this match up.  It was the closest  of the week between the Kiegl Titans and Victorious Secret.  The score was close and was revealed by a well placed shot at the end.  The Defenses here were the only thing resembling beautiful unique snowflakes (Cardinals for Kiegl with 3 sacks, 4 interceptions and a TD; and the Chiefs with 2 sacks and 2 interceptions, only allowing 7 points).  Overall, it was a squeaky clean game with the soap being sold to stores at $20 a bar.  On Sunday night the Titans were ahead but Eddie Lacey's 50 rushing yards brought Victorious the Victory - 89.68 to Kiegl Titan's 88.48.  I am Victorious's fulfilled potential.  I am the Titans inflamed sense of defeat.

The Demogorgon is in the upside down, she lost again with only 73.22 points.  Her QB (Lesser Manning) didn't break Eleven points.  Even though the Jets got an interception - Leggo my Eggo! - they still only brought in 7.40 points.  Doug Martin and AJ Green brought in a combined 63 yards - a couple of Lando Calrissians.  Starting the season off at 0-2 means that this Thursday morning is a time for coffee and contemplation.  The Demogorgons are going to get it together! I'm stealthy, like a Ninja.

I'll Drink to That toasted her victory against the Demogorgon with 84.62  points.  It wasn't an epic win, but it was a win and at least her team's got personality.  A dog's got personality.  Personality goes a long way.  About as long as DeMarco Murray's 67 yard run; far enough for her to win this dance competition.  Unfortunately, most of her team needed a shot of adrenaline directly to the heart - they scored below 10 points.  Her Royale with cheese was Carson Palmer 308 yards for 3 passing TDs.

EBDB BnB and In Your Endo faced off this week and it was a high scoring show stopper.  EBDB had 7 players with over 14 point, that kind of excess can only be described as gluttony.  In Your Endo's Kicker, Justin Tucker scored 10 of the Ravens 25 points, jeez he's greedy - leave some for the rest of your team!  The Raider's D were sloth-like and only managed to bring home 3.5 points for EBDB.  Matt Forte had a lusty performance running for 100 yards and 3 TDs for In Your Endo. Really, EBDB should be proud he started his optimal line up and didn't leave any points on his bench, well done!  And In Your Endo has every right to be envious because if he had started Fitzpatrick over Wilson, and Diggs instead of Maclin he would have scored an additional 27.90 points.  In the endo it was In Your Endo filled with Wrath, he fell to our high scorer of the week EBDB BnB with 125.46 to 143.12.

Rozzie Square and Bobbum Man's match was like a science experiment.  Bobbum stuck with the same recipe, he didn't change his lineup at all from Week 1.  Rozzie made just one change to her recipe, yo, subbing in Matt Jones for Jamaal Charles, a good choice since Charles was on the bench and Jones brought in 65 yards and a TD.  It was Melvin Gordon that made the difference - his pure crystal 102 rushing yards and a TD made the difference in this game's final product.  But for who? That's right.  Now, say my name.  Bobbum Man.  

The Vinegar Strokes beat Your Wife My Kids with an impressive Defensive score from the Panthers of 29.80.  He wasn't perfect, he started Rawls who brought negative 7 rushing yards and only 15 positive ones - I can't say I agree with your roster work there, Vinegar. But, Oh, Geez, Kelvin Benjamin had 2 TDs and 108 receiving yards.  The Vinegar Strokes starts the season 2-0.  What are ya doin' to your friends there?

Your Wife My Kids lost to the Vinegar Strokes by 12.98 points.  He has the right basic instincts, but he's got Adrian Peterson who went down with a torn meniscus with 2.60 points earned, at least he got off before he got offed.  He's had a couple solid players (Isiah Crowel, 133 yards and 1 TD, and the Broncos D with 5 sacks, 1 interception, 1 fumble recovery and 2 TDs - wait really?), but I think YWMK is distracted, I wonder why?

As he reminded us pre-draft, he's a legend, so he's sticking with his team name.  Not Mr. Ledgerwood, it's The Legend, or his Legendariness, or El Legendario.  Whatever it is, he made the right calls this week.  He didn't start his optimal lineup but even if he had he still wouldn't have gotten a W, he lost by 4.5 to Mocha's Maniacs.  His QB, Phillip Rivers, threw 4 TDs and 203 yards that's a hell of white boy, Jackie.  Unfortunately, late in the first quarter one of his RBs, Johnathan Stewart went out with a hamstring injury.  Its a bummer that one little body part can slow down The Legend's plans.

Mocha's Maniacs didn't have any outstanding players, but every player scored within 10 points of each other, so she had consistency and it really tied the team together.  Matt Stafford threw an interception and only brought in 11.5 points, at least he's housebroken.  Her whole team took the game pretty seriously, 3 TDs, 4 players over 100 yards and not one of them put a toe over the line.  Mocha's Maniacs struck a win over The Legend with 111.8 points - just goes to show don't mess with a Mexican maniac.

Check out the websites of Joey Spiotto and Josh Cooley for more of their awesome movies turned kids book art.  Happy Football everyone!