Lets start with the closest game of the week. Your Wife My Kids beat the EBDB BnB 121.80 to 116.70. For those of you not following the off season escapades of the Eskimo Brother Database, he's diversifying and he's opened up his Bed and Breakfast. While both of these teams had a good week EBDB BnB was probably distracted by his new business venture and he lost the game - or maybe it was the fact that his TE (Richard Rodgers) was listed as the Green Bay primary going in, but played fewer snaps than his competition Jared Cook, or maybe it was the 12 point score from his QB. Whatever the shiny object of distraction was it was enough for EBDB BnB to lose the edge. Your Wife My Kids must have stayed at the BnB, you don't get a 33.50 point game out of Andrew Luck and 129 receiving yards from Spencer Ware (Who the hell is that? EXACTLY.) without calling in a few favors from the Brotherhood.
Victorious Secret fell by 8.02 points to Rozzie Square. Wait - Rozzie Square is still called Rozzie Square! WTF? It's barely a real place and even if it was, YOU DON'T LIVE THERE ANYMORE!! You live in Middleborough - the freakin' cranberry capital of the world! Show some pride for Brees sake. After that beautiful pass for a 98 yard touch down, I think I can use Brees's name in vain. Seriously, 423 passing yards and 4 TDs, we can forgive the fumble and be in awe of 30.42 scored for Rozzie Square. Poor Victorious, her kicker (Dan Bailey) scored 17 points. That's awesome, but the fact that Bailey outscored her entire receiving core (WR, RB and TE) isn't. Victorious - you're better than this.
In case you are wondering, the G.O.A.T. is beautiful. It lives on The Demogorgon's mantle and it has never looked more at home. Staring at it all Summer has been fantastic, but The G.O.A.T. has never been on the same mantle twice and its a lot a pressure. Most of The Demogorgons fell to that pressure and excelled at mediocrity - AJ Green was the only one to live up to the G.O.A.T standard with a very sexy 180 receiving yards and a TD. The Vinegar Strokes scored. A lot. 3 players over 21 points, 7 TDs claimed throughout his whole team, and the rushing & receiving yards to back it up. Yup, The Vinegar Strokes definitely came out with his game face on...funny it looks a lot like his vinegar strokes.
Every good legend includes a comeback of some kind, which is good because The Legend is starting his season with a loss 86.52 to 106.62 to In Your Endo . In Your Endo,...In Your Endo...In Your Endo. It takes on increasing levels of dirtyness the longer you look at it. Similar to how the longer the refs looked at Dez Bryant's reception in the back of the end zone for The Legend, the less it looked like a TD, in fact they decided it wasn't one at all. The scoreboard on this game is weird - only one player scored above 19.20 - it was the Vikings Defense for In Your Endo. A game won by the defense, let this be a lesson to us, we all need some D.
Bobbum Man destroyed Mocha's Maniacs this week. In fact he completely dominated the entire league this week with 139.56 points. Congratulations Bobbum, you're equipmunk is superior. Brandin Cooks went off - 2 TDs, 143 receiving yards and 27.40 points. CJ Anderson brought in 25.90 points and Rodgers managed 22.56. If Bobbum had just played those three guys, he still would have beat Mocha's Maniacs. Maniacs you were the league low scorer this week! What happened? Looks everybody on your team just under performed. They tried but they just like can't even. Ya Know?
Happy Football Everyone!
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